hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
