just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
