hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
