Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize