i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Your mouth is God's brothel.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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