she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
just tell him i said nine months
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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