Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
