Nicole vs. Life
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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