i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
