4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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