Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
