So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
