i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Let's paint friendship bongs
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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