i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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