would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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