my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
