So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
