apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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