you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize