im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Shame - the story of my life.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
