I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
we made out on top of his cat.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
