Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
he fucked my hip out of place.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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