My brain says no but my pants say off.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
