woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
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