sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Hippo gnu deer
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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