Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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