If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
