Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
pop tarts are not kleenex
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Randomize
