So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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