Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
