an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
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