It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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