I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
