Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
