Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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