All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
