But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You made out with two different species that night
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
