At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
