In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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