I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
it's like heaven, but drunker
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
