Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
