Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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