i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
