you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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