Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Randomize
