You really coming over, don't trick.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
