do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
