I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Church boner. Awkwardddd
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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