Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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