She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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